Last Thursday was my very last day of Vietnamese language class. I sat in the hallway, right outside of the classroom, with about ten other of my classmates as we waited for the teacher to test us on our Vietnamese dialogue individually.
As we were waiting, I was telling half of them about a story how I was asked out to lunch by a 50 or 60-year-old man on school campus last year, and how it grossed me out. It grossed them a little out too (I am 21 years old for those who don’t know). Few minutes later, one of the classmates, Caucasian man in his late 40′s-possibly early 50′s, walked out of the classroom, looking refreshed as ever now that he had gotten his finals done and over with.
He walks towards us and says, “Well, I’m done, it was a pleasure having you guys in my class.”
“Yeah, thanks, you too,” The four of us replied (not in the exact words and time of course).
He turns to me, not looking quite refreshed as he was a minute ago, and starts to blink excessively.
Please don’t do what I think you’re going to do. Please.
He opens his mouth, and after a few stutters, he ask, “Do you-do you think I can get your information?” He hands me his notebook and pen, “I want to keep in touch. And you wanted to take drum class…and so do I.”
I was right. My worst fear of taking this class with him always sitting next to me came to reality. He asked for my number. And not only that, it was witnessed by everybody in my class, whom I just informed–just a few minutes ago–about the other old head who asked me out to lunch last year.
Fucking-a, can this get anymore awkward?
I sure as hell did not want to put my number down for him, yet at the same time, I really didn’t want to embarrass him in front of our classmates either. He’s actually a nice guy. If he was a perverted, horny, dirty-mouthed little fuck, I wouldn’t give a shit. But he isn’t. And I didn’t have the balls to give him back his notebook with an empty page.
Okay, think. Think. Think. I was given a notebook and pen without a gotdamn choice. What could I possibly write down in his black book that would benefit both of us?
I scribble my information down and handed him back his notebook. He looks at the page, his facial expression didn’t change.
It was my email address.
“Well thanks,” he stares at the page, then begins to study it as if it was an encryption to my phone number. After realizing what I had written down for him probably wouldn’t suffice, he takes his wallet out of his back pocket and hands me his business card, “here’s my card, call me.”
Boy I sure hope there’s a working block feature on Gmail.
I wouldn’t have written that recent incident if it didn’t happen that often, but it does, and I’m sad. The average of a young guy (20-30 age range) hitting on me irl is equivalent to getting flu shots: once a year (exaggeration not included). However, the average of a 45+ older white man is, believe it or not, roughly five to eight times a year. *Also, I hope I didn’t offend anyone but I say white because they have always been white..and older.
I don’t know why I attract them, older men. I probably smell like death, or the complete opposite, I exude some kind of magical scent of Asian persuasion that only works on 45+ year old males. Still, I’m perplexed.
Maybe it’s because I talk too much. I’m known to carry very long conversations with strangers of any age, size, and ethnicity as long as the topic interests me-but the strangers I talk to are always a lot older. I guess old people got a lot to talk about. And I guess, the longer you’re willing to listen and converse with them, the more they think you’re attracted to them.
Then again, I tend to display subtle hints or signs to show that I’m not interested…but then again, I don’t think men, of any age really, is capable of reading hints from the opposite sex anyway.
Have I dated any of them?
Yeah, twice, it was weird.
Just kidding.
In all honesty, I can’t date a man who’s old enough to be my father, simply because I don’t think I can relate to somebody who has already gone through at least 20 years of life, 20 years of life of which I haven’t even lived through yet.
Even if they were talented, rich, sexy man beasts like Brad Pitt and Viggo Mortensen–gawd are they sexy–I still wouldn’t do it. I just can’t relate. To relate, ‘least for me, creates connection and bonding, therefore I can’t date older men.
Also, if they had a daughter around my age, there’s a chance she and I would end up becoming one another’s BFFs. Kiss and tell would be a little awkward.
Geez awkward! I would shoot annoyed looks but I may not be as nice of a person as you. I just think people should hit others around their ages..I’m against huge age gaps in relationships lol at least for myself.
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Tiff Reply:
May 30th, 2009 at 11:43 am
I’m OK with people hitting on other people who are significantly younger or older, as long as they know that whoever they’re perusing is actually interested as well (and that it’s legal).
However, older men tend to pick up on younger girls on a whim. That, I hate, a lot. They don’t care if it’s uncomfortable for them because they have nothing to lose. They’re old. (Probably should’ve mentioned that on my entry lol)
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i got asked once by some guy 20 years or so my senior and it was traumatic. yech.
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See…I think these older men are asking out younger, hotter girls because when they were your age they wouldn’t even consider asking someone out…let alone a girl. I also feel like these men feel like they missed their chance in talking to girls so they try it at a late age–which makes them so scary and sad. Especially trying to take ANOTHER class with you! He seems so sad. What I usually do is pretend that I do not speak English when they approach me. I’ve only been caught once when the guy actually spoke the language. And I said, “oh shit” in English. FML. Too bad I am only approached by older white guys and I do my best to appear my most unattractive and they stare, follow me around and gawk like I have a neon sign over my head. You should get one that says: “Please, no. GO AWAY”
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*shudders*
last year, i had a 40 year old asian guy try to ask me out. it freaked me out because he was even grabbed one of my hands asking me if i was cold. GAHHHH! i totally ran as fast as i could as soon as i lied to him that i was late for class.
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Oh god. How does that happen? That’s really weird! You never seemed to me like the type who would attract older men. Then again, I suppose I don’t think I know what those type look like (or that a type like that even exists!)
You’re so sweet though with not wanting to embarrass him in public. And you’re a fast thinker! Goodness, I wouldn’t have thought to give him my email address (but thanks for the idea just in case! lol)
I wonder if it’s not you so much as it is where you live. Just a thought.
My dilemma has always been getting hit on by older men… but not THAT much older. And getting hit on might be the wrong word. Way before I was 18, I’ve had guys in their mid 20s to early 30s try to chat me up. God, I had to be creative with letting them know how old I am without just resorting to, “I’m a minor and if you don’t stop, you could potentially go to jail!” I always resorted to telling them about a class which was almost always followed with “where do you go to school?” then I had to say my high school and the way they reacted was always my favorite part! And sometimes that was really hard because some of them were cute and really fun to talk to! But now that I’m over 18, it’s still weird for me because I just don’t know what a guy in his late 20s or early 30s could want from me. Granted, most of them don’t know how old I am when they first try to talk to me (and I’m told I seem older because I can carry out a sensible conversation… which is almost insulting as that implies that they think most 19 year olds can’t! BUT that also means they’re not just pedophiles). But yeah, I don’t know if I should keep closing guys like that off or not.
Ahh this is getting long. Haha I apologize for taking up wayyy too much space… it’s just that this is interesting post as always (excuse the kiss-ass-iness of that but I promise I mean it!) Good luck on that.
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that’s just creepy blergh!
either I don’t ever notice my surroundings (strong possibility) but ancient guys don’t hit on me EXCEPT for this one time ages ago when I was 14 – went with the family for some kinda viet anti-communist thing or something… this guy about mid-20s or so I guess, really greasy looking… was trying to chat to me and saying I’m pretty and where did I live and stuff AND MY PARENTS (and siblings) were right there with me… the nerve! I think I grabbed Mai and made her stand close to me maybe trying to hint to him that I’m really childish, you know like Mai (she would have been about 10 at the time) and I gave him like one word vague answers… some people just don’t get the hint to go away…
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I’m not yet 30, so for me seeing an old man hitting on a younger girl is quite gross for me. I’ve seen these kind of ‘couples’ en mass while I was in Singapore. But if one day I’m old and single, who knows ^^
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ditto
i get hit on bout as many times as getting flu shots, but oh wait, i dont get flu shots!
ha!
joke’s on me.
there’s so many asian people here and im not the kind that white guys like i think.
occassionally (twice in 3 years?) i get hit on by some awwkard sweaty asian boy …sigh..
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Oh poor Tiff… I can’t imagine what you must go through. But that was a smart move giving him your email. He must’ve been disappointed! Did you get any emails from him yet?
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yaa totally awkward. LOL. The whole e-mail thing .. genius quick thinking! HA! And I totally completely undoubtedly agree when you say “men, of any age really, is capable of reading hints from the opposite sex anyway.” .. HAHA.
Tiff, you have the “asian persuasion” to attract all men. I doubt you smell of death.. lol that would probably just scare them away.. knowing that they’re old. lol
mann.. i don’t remember how it feels to get hit on.. or i don’t even remember the last time someone asked me for me “information”. haha. Gosh darn.
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I get hit on by gay men a lot. A lot. I’m a friggin’ fag stag!
If you think an old guy is gonna hit on you or ask you for your number, do this: Wink at him and tell him, “Come here. No, no. Closer. Closer. Come here.” When he leans in, fart in your cupped hand and waft it up to his nose. Then tell him, “Merry Christmas!”
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Tiff Reply:
June 5th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
Haha!
You know what’s funny? I usually say “Merry Christmas” when I give someone something useless.
You clearly know me too well.
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love the new layout.. and at least you get asked out? I haven’t been asked out in the last four years. maybe having a boyfriend means you give off some “already taken” pheromone >_>
I think email is the safer thing to give out when you don’t want people to be in close contact… good save!
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I would be forever grateful for the rest of my life if you could send me a look book code,haha I know this isnt even near that article but im very untechy
thank you SO much
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