Archive for September, 2009

About a week ago, my friend, Jules, used me as a model for her mom’s jewelry store.  I never had such proper treatment before.  And I never had that much makeup being put on to one single face…my face.

Jules, a MAC makeup artist, did a great job regardless.  It was crazy! I never knew that my own dork face was capable of such impeccable hotness, all thanks to Jules and her fine makeup artistry.  Here are some photos of the shoot, some of them are “actual” shoots and others were from our regular cameras mostly for fun:

Boy do I love makeup.  Isn’t it great how putting a little can accentuate features?  And putting lots of it on can really altar a woman’s face in drastic measures, capable of deceiving men? And speaking of men, I wonder if they–who are attracted to women that always wear caked-on powder, caked-on lipgloss, caked-on eyeshadow, and whatever other form of cosmetic they’d put on to their heart’s content–are aware of what might be underneath the cake-laden face.

After a couple of hours of shooting, I drove home with the makeup on.  On my way there, some guy driving next to me stared and whistled at me, and made flattering remarks.  Usually, this doesn’t happen.   And this whole time, I couldn’t help but to think, “If he only knew…”  If he only knew that the glossy lips, the rosey cheeks, the long lashes weren’t hereditary.  If he only knew that I really don’t wear makeup unless I go out for a special occasion or that I’m with my boyfriend (sorry Matt!).

If he only knew that he was actually whistling to this:

Lol

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Categories: Shut up and...Makeup?, Wtf

It was my second day of school today and I was headed to the library to finish some work.  I walked in, saw an empty table and took it.  As I was ready to write, this thin, crooked-teeth, morning-haired Asian guy walked up to me with this confident yet ‘credibly disturbing grin on his face.  Already,  I knew this guy was some kind of psycho. Was it a if-I-can’t-have-her-then-no-one-else-can kind of psycho? Or a I’m-in-love-with-her-but-I-never-met-her-before psycho? Or a combination of both? I don’t know, but gawd, I hope I don’t find out.

“’Scuse me, is this seat available? Mind if I take it?” He puts his hand over the top of the chair that was next to mine.

“No, go ahead.”

He pulls the chair, sits in it, and looks at me.  “You thought I was going to take it, huh? Ha ha.”

“Oh wow yeah, you got me,” I looked at him, couldn’t help but glance at his teeth.  They were like baby teeth, almost jagged at the bottom and his little baby canines were pointing towards each other. Creepy I thought. I then tried to focus on my paper, to insinuate to him that I wasn’t interested in talking, or in him for that matter.

“Name’s Tim,” he puts his hand over my paper suggesting that I shake it.

“Tiff,” I shaked it (ew). I try to look at my paper again.

As I was thinking about what to write for my paper, clearly not wanting to converse, he starts to fiddle with my keys that were on the table.

“I just want to take your keys, go to every car in the parking lot and try to open them.  And once I find your car I’m going to take it to the pound.”

(^He either said that, or  “I’m going to pound it”.  Not sure, was too weirded out to remember the exact quote)

“Oh…wow,” That’s all I could think of at the moment, I mean, what can you honestly say to that? I was at loss and was actually starting to get scared for my life.

“Ha ha I bet you think I’m a real funny guy, huh?”

“No not really…I was thinking of something else,” I really, really wanted this Tim guy to go away but without being an ass. “No offense, but I have some work to do so I really can’t talk to you.”

“W-w-wait wait, you seem like a very interesting person–and I’m sensing a really good vibe here,” He scans my body, meticulously, with his psychopathic pervy eyes from head to toe, toe to head. I cross my arms, hoping that it would somehow shield him from checking me out, “I want to talk to you, get to know you more.”

“Well…eh if you bump into me again on campus you can say ‘hi’,” I shrugged, “that’s the best I can do for ya.”

“How about I call you?” He leans in forward.

“I don’t think my boyfriend would like that.”

“But we can be just friends.”

“Still, you’re a stranger to me, I just met you a minute ago, I’m not going to give you my number.”

“We’re just friends.”

“We’re not friends, and I don’t want you to call me.”

“Is it because you’re insecure?”

With a louder, border-line booming OH NO YOU DIDN’T tone, I responded, “Insecure? It’s because I’m not that trusting, and I would never give you my number anyway because you’re coming on too strong,” I’m sure people in the library heard me.

“Fine, I’ll let you do your homework.” He walks away looking rather pissed, like a little girl who didn’t get the barbie she wanted.

After that incident I finally had the chance to do finish my paper in peace…ish. I was actually very much paranoid the whole time. As I writing, I was expecting the weird fucker to come back and attack me from behind, pulling a chunk of my hair out just so he can make a hair doll and masturbate to it everyday.

Thankfully, that didn’t happen, but yeah, he’s a creepy little sucker ain’t he?

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Categories: DERRRPPP!!!, Wtf