I was interviewed for a graphic design internship position (with pay!) for a production company about a week ago. I’ve worked at my current job for six long years, and–though I am not bragging– all of the jobs I had in the past were practically offered to me, therefore I royally suck at interviews ’cause I rarely get interviewed.

I guess I should finally confess to you guys that I’m far from being a decent talker. I believe that going on the internet all the time and rarely socializing with real life people since I was 12 had a little something to do with my lack of ability to carry a smooth conversation that didn’t have any stalling and stuttering. It’s awful. Let’s say if I decided to do a vlog right now, without any scripts or rehearsals, you’d have a YouTube video with one HELL of an awkward girl in it.

“Um…hey…..um guys. Yeah, so, uh…yeah, um…this is my vlog. Hmmmmmmmm….” (fades into the dark)

Now back to the interview. My answers were made up of ums, yeah, uh, and lots of stalling. Most of the questions thrown at me were pretty…WTF HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO ANSWER THAT!? and I was extremely nervous since I didn’t have a lot of experience with job interviews. I was so nervous that the interviewer had to say, “You’re so nervous, just calm down! We’re chill people.” I knew right then and there he wanted to grab the side of my shoulders and just strangle the ever living nerves out of me.

Geez. If only talking to a person was like writing a Facebook comment, where you can edit and delete what you say before “submitting”, life would be much easier.

But you know, there is one thing, the only questions I think I rocked at were the technical questions. If I had it my way, I would only allow questions such as “What tools from Photoshop would you use to recreate this picture?” instead of “Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”–JUST, NO!

I knew my chances of getting this internship was pretty slim, and seeing how many other candidates were waiting to get interviewed had stifled my confidence a bit.

The great twist to this story is that I heard back from the guy who interviewed me, saying how he wanted to offer the internship to me.

Yep, really didn’t expect that one. Time to celebrate–here are s’more polymer clay creations I made!

I’m so grateful to have such a close friend who happens to be a very talented makeup artist. Jules, that friend, has once again transformed my face into something better and more tolerable to look at. She asked me to pose for most of her jewelry (she did not make them) which she plans to sell. And in return, she gave me her silvery bedazzled collar necklace (pictured top right). I love it so much!

Oy, I just love her l33t makeup skills. If only I looked like this naturally, but ey, we all know what’s really underneath it all. I don’t want to remove this face when I go to bed tonight. I just don’t.  Tears will surely run when I wash my face tonight.

The dress is from H&M. I have a love and hate relationship with it. Sometimes, I think it’s sweet and simple but most of the times, I feel like it’s too granny for my uh, youthfulness. Every time I wear this dress to work, only the 70+ women would compliment it. Which is totally adorable and all, yet I have to question my taste in fashion at the same time.

If you’re curious to check out the rest of the pictures then le Flickr is where you want to go!

Moar polymer clay, MOAR! So yeh, I made some more, but this time, with a little more cuteness and less blood and poop. When I first started it, the thought of mixing colors with other colors had never occurred to me. Which explains why there were so many basic boring colors used in the first pictures. Now I’m mixing them and playing with the colors, so far the pastel palette is pretty rockin’.

In real life news, I’m so stressed that it shows in my health, and my zits. I rarely talk about my personal life anymore on here, but I’m pretty stressed that nothing comes else to mind when I want to blog (besides polymer clay, it is my stress reliever!).

Here are a few things I want to get out of my system:

• I could have gotten my B.A. years ago, but decided to skip school to pursue acting. I’m sure some of my old readers remembered that, and in case you were wondering what happen…I actually did a couple of acting gigs and took acting courses for two years, and eventually given up after realizing I had no support from most of the people I cared about.  Afterwards, I became very lazy and unmotivated for almost 3 years, with everything. And this year, I’ve barely started picking up where I left off from, school-wise. I can’t fuck up my own future by being dependent on other people’s support.
• If you follow my Twitter you know that work turns me into a very grumpy, ungrateful person. This is by far the hardest job I’ve ever had. I’m fortunate to have a really awesome boss, but it’s the customers that make me want to remove my eyeballs out with an ice-cream scooper. When you’re working in a field that does both medical and retail/cosmetic (optometry), you need to grow some tough skin, but sometimes I have a hard time achieving that.
• Oh god, the expenses! For the first time, I’m unable to pay my credit card bill in full. I think going to France had a little to do with it. Also the medical bills (I has no insurance), driver license renewal, car insurance…it just never ends.

Welcome to the adult world, Tiff!