I don’t like the thought of leaving older posts left untouched as it keeps getting pushed back with each new entry I write, so I decided to post some of my past entries that either had the most hits and/ the ones I had the most fun writing. Commentary is added in for good measure!
Dating Manuel #4: Do not use Flattery as Your Main Weapon
In the online dating sphere, nobody is safe, so read on young padawans.
IRL, I think it only applies to guys who aren’t exactly blessed with good looks:
Scenario 1 – Attractive hunk goes up to a girl and says, “You’re really cute.” Her reaction? She’s flattered. Blushing. Possibly getting her thong a little wet.
Scenario 2 – Not-so-attractive Joe goes up to the same girl and says, “You’re really cute.” Her reaction? Unimpressed. Disgusted. Getting creepy vibes from Joe.
Missing the Toilet Should be a Crime
I will never, ever put my things down on the floor when I’m using a public restroom because some women leave their piss droplets on floors and toilet seats. Sick.
Kanye West Shutter Shades are Dumb
If you wear them for fun, that’s great. But if you actually use them for actual sunglasses, then you need to get sucker punched.
I Hate Clubbing
There was a time when I went to a few clubs where my friends and I started separating. When I was by myself I usually sat in the corner, only to observe the negative traits of the club scene. At present, I don’t hate clubbing, I just rather do something else.
Hot People are so Gotdamn Boring
I’ve been around conventionally “hot” people for a while now and I know well enough that an overwhelming number of them lack personality and substance, greatly.
Five Thugnificent ways to Gangstify Yourself
My brother-in-law and I were messing around with my sister’s white rhinestone crusted bandana that she had back in the day when it was considered a trend. We took pictures of my nephew with all of the various ways of wearing the bandana just for fun and the pictures later gave me an idea to write about its accounts in fashion history (most of it was bullshit).
Hi, I have a Stuttering Problem
Please don’t make fun of me. Wah.
On Bullying
a.k.a my list of “People to bust a roundhouse kick to the face”
How to Survive a Slasher Movie
Horror/slasher movies pisses me the fuck off because all of the dumbass characters get killed off so effortlessly. For the sake of not pissing me off, I made up a few simple instructions on surviving.
We Would Like to Play the Wii Pole
Wii Fit forgot to add in pole dancing lessons.
I <3 Dentist
I’m one of those slightly sick and twisted patients who actually enjoys going to the dentist and I’m surprised that my horrifying dental experiences as a child didn’t traumatize me.
Bugs are Worthless
I witnessed a mini bug brawl that took place in my very own bathroom. It was pretty intense.
